The man who says fuck loudly.

I did not write this. I jotted it down as I observed it in a bar. There was an initial exchange that was so weird that I wanted to capture it on paper so I pulled out a pen and a notecard. I never got around to writing down the first bit. Here is what followed.

I am trying to mind my own business but this overtakes me. I am in a bar drinking an oak aged red imperial stout dubbed "Big Hoppy Monster". Two men begin talking at the bar beside me.

"Did I tell you my mom has a new boyfriend?"
"No, what?" calmly disinterested the man who likes to say "fuck" loudly is texting.
"He's like sixty-five with no legs."
"I don't understand"
"She's forty-five and he's sixty-five and has no legs. Have you met him?"
"No. Wait," looking up briefly, "what do you think ..."
"Well he's nice but he's sixty-five and's got no legs. My mom's forty-five ... and has legs. I mean .. well he's got legs but they're plastic."
"So do they fuck?"
"I ... I don't know," obviously uncomfortable with the question on several levels. "I guess they .. are like any other couple."
"I mean we're sexual creatures right?" his phone now closed he is being more attentive perhaps realizing what he has said or how he said it.
"Right, I hope they fuck. But I don't think about it."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, do you think about that?"
"Your mom fucking?"
"No, yours."
He, this man who like to say "fuck" loudly, opens his phone again, shaking his head slowly and says "My dad has legs."